… why do I get nervous when I want to feel confident?
… why can’t I make a decision?
… why do I seem to freeze at crunch time?
… why are I afraid of people and situations?
… why do I quit almost before I begin?
… why do I procrastinate doing the things that would bring me the most benefit?
… why can’t I get myself to do the things that are best for me?
It doesn’t matter how supposedly successful people are in one or more areas of life… still their most common questions are often exactly the same or pretty darn close to the same ones as the people for whom nothing seems to work.
The things that bug people the most about themselves and their lives is that even when their emotional and physical pain are excruciating, they STILL CAN’T DO WHAT THEY KNOW THEY SHOULD DO TO GET RID OF IT.
There isn’t a person living or dead who can’t identify with that at some point in their lives.
But it’s only the strongest of mind who can overcome this most basic of human weaknesses.
Because habitual ways of thinking and acting rule us and every part of our lives.
For the first 25 years of my life, I was nothing BUT weak. Oh, sure, I had my reasons and excuses, and some of them were legitimate. Some were bull. But the bottom line was, my belief and thought patterns were of a weak person. Very little I did worked. Very rarely did I achieve anything worthwhile. Nowhere did I feel confident or excel. I had the self-image of a failure.
I can blame a lot of things, but none of it mattered.
Because each day is a new day and the Universe doesn’t care about what happens to you, and who did what to you.
It doesn’t matter that you don’t have this or that background or that you don’t look just right or feel just right.
This reminds me of a story about how on one particular game day, Michael Jordan had the flu and his temperature
was like 103 degrees, and he was puking his guts out, yet he played that day and scored over 30 points. He was so
exhausted that whenever he was on the bench, he held his head in his hands under a cold towel. He said he felt like he was on the verge of death. Yet his play was instrumental in winning that game.
He was asked later how he got himself to perform at such a high level even though he probably should have been in the hospital, and he said that all around the court that night, there were probably hundreds of kids whose parents brought them to see Michael Jordan play, and that it might be the only time they would ever get that chance again in their entire lives. And he wanted to give them a positive experience they could hang on to forever. He didn’t want to disappoint them.
His self image was that of someone who could and would do what it took to get the job done no matter what.
When your mental pictures are of you freezing, of shaking like a leaf, of failing, of making the wrong decisions, of
being weak of heart and mind… then that is what you will be.
On the other hand, no matter what the area of life and no matter what the discipline, when you can change your
habitual, automatic mental images to be ones of things working out as you want them to, they will.
When you can stop the negative, failure oriented inner voice to be that of success even in areas where you
“should” fail, you won’t fail, you will succeed. And often you will do it without effort or strain.
Because your inner self-talk and your mental pictures are the track you run on.
They are your daily road map.
Just like a train must stay on the tracks, your mental pictures, your inner self-communication is what guides every emotion you feel at every moment and they guide every action you take.
This one is especially tough to grasp for people who are very successful in one part of life but horrible failures in another part. To them it makes zero sense, this mental picture stuff. Because they feel supremely confident at one thing already, so they think they should be able to do anything well. And when they can’t, they blame everyone and everything else. It couldn’t possibly be their fault.
But over the long-term, it is. Maybe not over days or weeks, but when failure in a certain area of life lasts many months and years, you gotta blame yourself.
It’s the only way you can ever change and improve.
So if you want to be as successful in more than one area of life, you need to learn the mental pictures and inner communication of those that are already good at it.
For example, if you are an absolute in-vest-ment wizard and can turn a turd into gold, but you are terrible at
managing huge projects and horrible at relationships, then all you need to do is learn how to get a similar kind of success oriented mental pictures and learn the same kind of success oriented inner dialog as you have in finances and apply them to those other areas.
This is simply a principle of life. It always works every time because it is how our minds work.
When you accept this truth and decide to go about changing your mental pictures and your inner communication, like lightning, you can make such radical changes in your emotions and your decisions and actions, you won’t believe it.